unwinded -

-officer i'm sorry, i know i was speeding
-you were going way above the speed limit, maam
-i'm sorry officer
-where do you live?
-missouri (or is it ra)
-i'm goint to issue a ticket
-am i in iowa or missouri?
-sure hope you're in missouri maam. coz i'm a missouri state officer (shake of head)
-ummm. how much will it be?
-you can appeal it if you come to court (court is 2 hours away from where i live)
-ummm. how much..?
-(mumbles very expensive figure)
-oh god!
-sorry maam..
-can't you blame it on the wind, officer? (bat bat bat)
-the wind was blowing against you maam..

9@&^%$#*^#$! (expletive)